The last 4 months have been pretty rough on me. The business that my husband and I started on our wedding day and sacrificed lots of sleep and much of our personal lives for gasped its last breath. We had to claim bankruptcy. We had owned our business for 13 years, so it was pretty tough for me to let it go. Although my honey has pretty much taken all of this in his stride, it really knocked me off my emotional center.
A couple of weeks ago I was reading Money Love: A Guide to Changing the Way That You Think About Moneyby Meadow DeVor. In her book she introduced me to the Abundance Scale. If any of you know about Abraham Hicks, this is similar to their Emotional Guidance Scale. The Abundance Scale is a tool Miss DeVor uses to measure how you are feeling about your current experience and rating that on a scale from -10, meaning the worst you can feel about your current experience, to +10, meaning the absolute best you can feel about your current experience. It helps make you aware of how what you are feeling moment to moment is attracting the experiences you draw to you.
I have to admit, when I read that and took a look at the Scale – it was as if someone hit me over the head! I realized I had lost my focus. I had allowed myself to wallow on the lower end of the scale for quite some time – not just the last 4 months, but the last 3 years. No wonder we attracted all of the financial mess we did.
Regardless of the recession I think it was time for us to let that business go. Our hearts weren’t into it like when we first started and both of us were craving a different lifestyle. But my stories of “Because the economy collapsed, all of our clients aren’t willing to invest in big, high-paying projects anymore” and “Working with the Government sucks” was keeping me in a very stuck place and not allowing me to see new opportunities.
So what does my very personal story have to do with you? Well, what stories are you telling yourself and other people? Are you still complaining to your girlfriend – or even worse – your date about what a Jackhole your ex is? Do you like to compare stories about how horrible your last date was? Or maybe you are not even allowing yourself to go out and date because you figure, “What’s the point?”
Finish this sentence: “I would really like to get married again, but ____________ .”
Or, “I would really like to be in a love relationship, but ______________ .”
However you finished that sentence – that is your story. And guess what? It’s a lie! I know – it feels very real. You have all kinds of ‘evidence’ to back your story up – but it is still a lie. And the trouble with telling yourself lies is that they keep you very stuck. They keep you on the low end of the Abundance Scale, and that is not a fun place to be. When you are hanging out on the low end of the Abundance Scale you can’t even see all of the opportunities and abundance that exist literally all around you.
So how are we going to change that?
Just becoming aware of how you are feeling throughout your day will go a long way towards helping you to feel better. Several times a day, check in with yourself. Where are you at on the Abundance Scale?
How you feel really is a choice, and you can make a conscious choice to look at your experience from a different perspective and choose a thought that makes you feel better.
It’s time for you to finally get love RIGHT!
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